Don't ask then!!!

People, people, people,
and you...
Don't ask me to answer
a question honestly
and then go
APESHIT
when I do.

You want the truth,
YOU WANT THE TRUTH...????
Well, shiet you can't handle the truth!!!!

GOOD LORD.
I'll just lie my face off
next time.

Yea...yea...yea..
so I jacked a line from
A Few Good Men
and did a little creative editing....
call the cops.

It's our secret...

Yea,
I watch figure skating.
I like it too.
So,
sue me.

You can't take my man card away
because I'm not a man.

I know football/basketball
better then you..
so leave me be.

Btw,
I won't tell
anyone that you
teared up during
Joannie Rochette's
performance.

No, I won't.

You're safe,
for now.

one day...really.

I admit it.
Yes,
I am normally very
envious of the male gender.
As a matter of fact,
I experience penis envy quite frequently,
for if I had one,
my life would be so much easier.

However, there is one day
of the year where I'm
perfectly content being a
female and that is Valentine's Day.
Not that I celebrate it
because I don't.

However, I would be lying
if I said I didn't enjoy
that very special day.
Oh, because I do love it,
not for the gifts though,
but for the pure entertainment value.

It brings me great joy
to see my male counterparts
strickened in their pathetic
attempt to purchase the
perfect gift at the last minute.
I even chuckle at them when
they ask for my help.
And sometimes, just sometimes,
I laugh mercifully
(behind their backs of course)
at their predicament.

Because even though my man
is far from perfect,
he treats me well enough
that on the 14th of every February,
I don't depend on flowers, chocolates,
or jewelry to feel special.
I, personally,
find it insulting
to have to wait for one day
out of the year
to be treated well.

So, gentlemen treat your ladies good everyday
and maybe you won't be so frazzled
every February.
And you too ladies,
find a good guy...
then those material things
won't really matter...
Both parties are happier that way!

WHO DAT is?

Being from "WHO DAT" nation,
many assume that come this Sunday
I will be donning my
Drew Brees jersey,
drinking me some Jager,
and ripping out my guts
cheering for "THE SAINTS."

Yes,
definitely,
if they were playing against
someone else.
Sadly,
they are being pitted
against
"THE COLTS"
MY COLTS.

Call me a traitor if you will,
spit on me if you want,
egg my house if you must,
but I will not be swayed.
My loyalty lies
with him.

Don't pretend like you
don't know who
HE
is.

He is
PERFECTION
personified.

You think he's pretty
sexy yourself (even if you're a die-hard Saints fan),
especially when he screams
out audibles.
Don't lie,
you do.
It's ok,
I'm not here to judge.

With a new coach,
no running game,
and new targets
many are banking on
THE COLTS
to lose
the Superbowl.

Call in your bets now playas,
but it's not guaranteed yet.

Because PEYTON MANNING
is at his best.
He's more productive then ever.
You won't hear it from him though,
he'll just prove it this weekend.
Because the league's
smartest,
hardest working
QB is about to get
his second ring.

WHO DAT?
DAT is DA MAN.

Yea, I said it.
And what?

opps...

Never said I was smart,
just smarter then you.

Much smarter.

so nice

My father is a wise man,
so full of knowledge he is.
He once told me
"don't sin my dear
for you will be punished."

Trust him, he said,
he knows,
for he fu@ked up soundly
and was given 3 daughters.

Thanks daddy.
I feel so warm inside.